Why is the owner field not added as a reference in graphQL via connect on create, but added as a reference back to the document instead

Help
1

I have the following mutation, it creates a reference fromt the User document back to the Decor Document, I want it the other way around, I want the Decord document to have a reference called owner to the user so that I can run the query below

mutation{
  createDecor(data:{
    description:"Plates"
    pieces:2,
    purchaser:"riel"
    alterations:true
    cost:20
    purchaseDate:"2021-03-11"
    category:"good"
    owner:{connect:"292780547368813064"}
  }){
    description
  }
}

right now this returns null for decor, because it has no reference back to the User, but the user has a reference to it which is not what i want because there are many decors per user.

query{
  findUserByID(id:"292780547368813064"){
    email
    catalog{
      clothing
    }
    decor{
      alterations
    }
  }
}
2

Literally writing this out helped me solve it, it needed to be a one to many relationship

type Catalog {
  decor: Boolean
  clothing: Boolean
  supplies: Boolean
  furniture: Boolean
  owner: User
}

type Decor {
  description: String!
  pieces: Int!
  purchaser: String!
  alterations: Boolean!
  cost: Int!
  purchaseDate: Date!
  category: String!
  owner: User!
}

type User {
  email: String! @unique
  catalog: Catalog
  decor: [Decor!] @relation
}